[Coda]

Chapter 5
The Hunter

First, the shaman must find what Mindell calls “The Spot”. In Western psychology, the spot is acquired by getting licensed, by being able “to regurgitate accepted knowledge under stress”. (58)

But a shaman is tested on being able “to follow your body instincts to survive on this earth. It requires connection to nature.” (58)

How a shaman heals is determined on his or her ability to find their own dreamingbodies and their patient’s.

The is called “the right spot”. (59) And many things determine this spot, including what role you’re being asked to play. This can get rather difficult because where the body needs to be may not be where the mind is.

But the shaman has tools to cope. These include the ability and talent of being in and out of altered states.

In fact, part of the reason for the hunt is to find power, as well as to find psychotropic plants. I found this comment by Mindell very fascinating:

“In my opinion, it is the unconscious interest and talent in hunting power that has addicted many indigenous people to drugs like alcohol.” (61)

I’m sure this is much worse due to the indigenous people’s land being stolen and their way of life being destroyed by the white man.

Considering that for many who hunt, it isn’t just about the hunt but a way of life, Mindell’s words make a lot of sense.

In this chapter, both the hunter and the prey are explored – “The insight that you are not only the killer, but one who someday will also be wiped out, gives you compassion for everything.” (62)

And the prey is also a part of you, taking on the form of perceptual irregularities and even voices and / or visual hallucinations. The prey may be spirits or ghosts, energy or voodoo, depending on your culture and background.

In Western thought, the prey could be “moods, dreams, or complexes” (64). It could be a kind of second sight or intuition.

Mindell encourages the reader to practice seeing visions and hearing voices and to explore altered states. Even hang out with paranoid fantasies! And, of course, use your second attention.

Really, this is about paying attention to all that is around you with all of your senses:

“You listen to what others say, but you also sense the unspoken, emotional background, the excitement, love, jealousy, and ambition that can transport the group out of its own ordinary reality.” (65)

But also, be aware of your own behavior. I think this is how you learn to control your altered states.

And for those of us who have altered states and are learning to work with them, this is very valuable information. The Western world does not look kindly on those who have altered states.

But you can control your altered states and find your talents there.

Mindell writes that your prior knowledge can hinder your hunt for power and for future. I have to wonder if those who go through a severe illness and have everything about themselves emptied out, including memory, may experience this wipe-out of prior knowledge as a gateway into shamanic power. Just a theory I had after reading this passage:

“What is the difference between a madman and a hunter? Actually, there is little difference, which is probably why earlier researchers in shamanism thought that the shamans were psychotic or epileptic. The difference between a shaman and an ordinary person swamped by experiences is that the shaman’s tightness allows her to lead an ordinary life. She knows that now she is ‘hunting,’ and now she is just shopping.” (67)

It is the shaman’s insight and control that defines her as a shaman more so than her experiences. This is the grand take away.

But there’s more:

“She can differentiate herself from her prey” (67).

Keep in mind, the definition of prey can mean your mood, your dreams, and your complexes. So a shaman, even during an altered state, is able to take full control over their mood and their behavior. In this way, the altered state is not out of control behavior. Mindell writes:

“As a hunter, you know you are the witness and do not become entangled in your visions . . . . You know when to identify with and when to dis-identify with your prey so that you are not its victim, not overwhelmed by experience.” (67)

I’m going to insert my own views here – having a steady practice and education in mindfulness can be VERY helpful with this.

I found insight in this passage:

“Psychology certainly has shamanistic roots, but it has somehow forgotten the ritual of honoring its resource. Psychology, without respect for the unknown, looks just like modern technology, which takes from the environment without giving back to it. It may be dangerous to delve into unconscious for one’s personal edification, to use dreams as they were one’s own.” (68)

This struck me as being so profound because psychology is based on an individual’s experience, as opposed to the collective experience of humans, animals, plants, and the universe. Most Western psychology is based on a person’s dreams as belonging to that person! No wonder it has such a bad track record.

I will keep this in mind the next time I have a dream and ask less, what does this mean in my own life? and more, what does this say about the universe?

The environment has so much wisdom, but it’s not ours alone on the individual level. Best to follow its wisdom. That’s the hunt.

The last part of this chapter deals with Personal History, freeing yourself from routines and your personal identity. Mindell says laughter can be a key to this:

“When you are able to laugh, not only are you looking for life, but you are living it. With this sense of freedom, you can track certain processes that have no routines. They are the magic that makes life worth living.” (69)

Gratitude is also key:

“To find the most magical element in life and the impulse for creativity, you need to be in a special, magical mood, the mood in which you are thankful for whatever happens, even if this is nothing. In other words, the way you hunt is by being the very object of your hunting.” (69)

This speaks to the concept of shamanism and being involved in the hunt as a way of life process.

The opposite of this could by your own self-identity. And Western psychology can make this worse because they “may inadvertently solidify that very sense of personal history that could finally hinder you from finding the shaman’s keys. If you always focus on the same issues, using the same methods, life begins to be predictable.” (70)

As always, Mindell ends the chapter with exercises. The one I want to write about is the first exercise – “find the spot”.

I actually have been practicing this for awhile. It’s called the body scan and there are many great versions of this:

Body Scan Exercise, Jon Kabat-Zinn

[Coda]

Chapter 4
First Lessons

From the first sentence of this chapter, there is an immediate sense of connection and access to spirits and guides in the form of nature.

Mindell writes:

“Shamans treat the environment as if it were filled with knowing spirits that agree and disagree with your path.” (page 41)

As typical of this book, there are also connections made in the Western and the Shamanic view:

“A Taoist would say that the power of shamanism comes from the Tao. A physicist might explain that a nonlocal connection links different points in the world’s field. Jung would have called this connection between the wind and the ideas of don Juan a synchronicity, that is, a coupling between two seemingly unlikely events felt by the person experiencing them to be meaningful. Shamanism reminds you that the environment has its own intelligence and is a part of you. Native spirituality is based upon the sense that plants are alive and feel. They are our brothers and sisters.” (42)

The book brings up the concept of the earth being able to dream. If you look to the Aboriginals, they believe in Dreamings, or ancestral entities, a kind of “world channel”.

And then Mindell breaks it down, bringing it from the macro to the micro. Individually, we all experience and perceive information through multiple channels – visual, auditory, and all of our other senses.

So this is the dreamingbody connected to the earth’s Dreamings.

And then the word “process” appears. I’ve been wondering how that fit in, as a lot of this is so new to me.

“To our native mind, our shamanic heart, the “world” means everything on earth: leaves, breezes, airplanes. Everything in your world is part of your process.” (43)

And as part of our process, there are guides and spirits to help us along. The process then as a series of “connections” and we aren’t out there in it alone.

We think we are so advanced now with our computers, microwaves, smart phones, and self-driving cars. But it came at a price. We are very, very disconnected with our Mother Earth. Mindell writes:

“Native thinking started from an entirely different paradigm, in which nature and mind were one. For nomadic people everywhere who live closely connected to the environment, being congruent with the world is not merely a theory or a philosophy, but a matter of life and death. If you are not at one with the environment, you could sleep in the wrong place and become the prey of animals.” (44)

It’s like because we have our technology and we don’t need the sun for heat and for light (we have the artificial kinds), we don’t sleep anywhere near wild animals (we have lost contact with their heartbeats), we don’t fear Mother Nature and we don’t respect her.

And another cost – “how you repress your own nature by failing to develop the second attention that experiences the earth as mysterious and alive.” (44)

There’s a sense of “awe” out in nature when you feel the unification – “You feel the world around you as if it were a body part or a partner, sending ou messages of agreements and disagreements, pleasure and stress. This sense is crucial if you need to fish or hunt to eat. But the way that native people relate to the environment is more than a matter of survival. It is the basis of their spiritual traditions and an integral part of their psychology. Sensing this voice of the natural environment can be an important method of self-protection and a path to knowledge.” (45)

Feeling the world around you “as if it were a body part or partner” is such a great, poetic way of exploring the concept of second attention. Remember, in second attention, we can travel in altered states.

Mindell goes onto explore the concept of “personal history” – meaning you need to detach yourself and not view yourself as the center of the universe. He speaks in the language of how you define yourself and the pressures of the outside world to define yourself for you. By removing your personal history, you take power.

The same type of experiences that form shamans – a severe illness, near-death experiences, etc. – are the same things that can make you detach from your personal history. Mindell writes, “During such difficult times, you are forced to undo yourself, to go to pieces, to free yourself from the tendency to think of yourself at any given time as one type of person with one type of task. Either you become fluid, or nature erases you in its own way.” (48)

I like the concept of breaking with personal history because it’s a way of breaking from your past.

As Mindell writes, “Separating from an old identity, system, or relationship is like dying.” (50)

In the section on Death as an Advisor – “According to a Buddhist ritual, you must meditate on your death every day. Many teachers agree that death is the only wise adviser you have”. (50)

It occurred to me that in the Western world, we not only do not do this, our customs of fearing death make us very powerless. We are hyper-attached to our personal histories and we fear death because we don’t mentally “practice” it. And yet, we watch murder after murder after death after death in our box of electric hallucinations, as Chris Hedges calls TV and internet.

We have a very fake and artificial view of it – we see the same actors getting killed on one show only to see him or her appear on something else.

Seriously, we live in a sick cartoon! My words, not Mindell’s, although perhaps he’d agree.

The next section is on taking responsibility:

“Taking responsibility means accepting everything you say, feel, hear, write, see, and communicate as part of you. Accepting your accidents and your lies is an act of compassion. Taking responsibility means that if you are sick, you must understand that the body is bringing up a dream you have not yet known. If you have relationship difficulties, accidents, or world problems, things are happening to you with which you are not in agreement. . . Taking responsibility requires appreciating what happens to you as potentially valuable.” (52)

I like this because it gives “meaning” to suffering.

And you can use second attention for this. It seems like altered states are very, very useful. I can see why the wiser cultures welcome voice hearers and vision seers as shamans.

Mindell lists more exercises at the end of the chapter. One is to be aware of the environment and to use your second attention.

Another exercise is to experiment with telling a lie, but only in your imagination. And turn the lie into a story. Create a myth!

Another exercise is to drop your personal history and use death as an advisor.

I tried this last one and I felt this enormous weight lifted off me! I let go of memory, let go of time, let go of feeling from inside of my body and I reached to feel from the walls and the window.

I get what he says at the end of this chapter:

“Imagine and experience living the freedom of your death in life, in the moment, at work, in relationships, and in the world.” (55)

[Coda]

This is what attracts me to Shamanism, it is not dependant upon religion, beliefs, dogma, doctrine – instead, it is about a universal human experience for accessing the unconscious wisdom that we all carry, and learning to apply it in our daily lives.

Yes! And I’m also thinking – less belief system and more lifestyle.

This is basically what we do in class – not remembering, or focusing on memory – but seeking to gain the positive trip, the affirming Journey. There is much to be learned from the dark, the frightening, the traumatic – but – by focusing on the uplifting, the pleasurable, the delight of Journeys, we can gain so much support and personal power that it aids us when the tough stuff comes up.

This is really good to read. I did a Shaman journey last week and it was noticeably “lighter”.

I think for me, it’s easy to conflate lighter with having less meaning and darker with being more serious (i.e. having more meaning).

But I think there’s really a lot of meaning in the lighter experiences.

Goes back to lifestyle. Goes to way of being.

There’s only so much baggage I care to take with me.

The exercise of re-visioning yourself is a good one. Another possibility might be to vision yourself as one who makes only rational, logical decisions – then – to re-vision yourself as one who only makes intuitive, in-the-moment decisions, following the gut. The real you lies in between, but by exploring these two extremes, you can learn a lot about what you love and what you fear about the way you perceive the world.

Thank you for this. I like this and will give this exercise a go.

Thanks for the feedback!

[Coda]

Chapter 3
The Path of Knowledge

The various paths to knowledge are explored here, not in detail, just a faint brushstroke illuminating a few.

There’s the shaman’s path, Jung’s path, processwork, the transpersonal path, the Zen path, and so on.

Mindell goes onto to write about “personal growth and development”. He writes, “In Cabalistic Judaism, personal development is likened to a magical tree that takes root, reaches for the sky, and develops all the branches of our powers.”(32)

“In alchemy,” he writes, “people are seen as unrefined mixtures of opposites.” And Keido Fukushima, a Zen master, states, “every day is a fine day,” meaning that even the most impossible fate is somehow acceptable with the right attitude.” (32)

Jung divides your life up in two parts – the first half involves adapting to society and the second half, you are dealing with universal and spiritual roles. Over time, you achieve what Jung called “individuation”.

Mindell asks what I think is a rather odd question – “How does the body change in response to increasing wisdom? (33)

I never thought about the body in this context. I always related wisdom to the brain and to the mind. I now understand more about the whole concept of the “shaman’s body”.

This awareness comes from all of your senses, so it makes sense that it comprises the body – that’s what does the sensing! The eyes, ears, skin, nose, mouth. We are alive that way.

As Mindell writes:

The shaman works at lucid dreaming, stalking visions, following body sensations, and worshiping nature, promoting not only person growth but environmental awareness and a sense of community . . . . the shaman works on the afterlife experience, so to speak–on events that happen after you gain freedom from your identity, your personal history. (34)

But the shaman doesn’t choose this. In fact, the shaman’s path is a forced one – “people are driven to it through illness, hereditary predisposition, dreams, magic, and bodily dismemberment.” (35)

So perhaps this “freedom from your identity” is the result of this illness or injury process, something so severe it causes disassociation and you are freed from your identity. While the event may be forced, it also provides a gateway or a path, perhaps, for those who chose to follow.

As Mindell writes:

Change comes sometimes from an unsolvable problem or koan, sometimes from a group interaction, sometimes from a body experience. Processwork does not focus on who you are or might become but on what you notice.” (34)

To me, this means the loss of identity and possibly a transference to an Observer state may lend itself to such awareness. You are removed from the picture and your awareness takes center stage.

Since, as Mindell writes, “We all live between two impossible worlds: the world of everyday reality and the world of inexplicable nature”, it all comes back to what we notice. And the shaman – through the heightened perceptions – is alive in the shaman’s body.

I think back to the previous chapter which focuses on “first attention” and “second attention” and now this chapter connects the dots between the concept of attention and the concept of development.

I’m understanding more now what processwork involves. In the Exercises section at the end of the chapter, Mindell asks the reader to recall the inexplicable forces on your path.

For me, I think of a very serious illness that I’m surviving. And this is my favorite exercise:

Use your imagination and consider the possibility that these inexplicable forces are potentially useful powers of your own. Imagine owning instead of disavowing them. (40)

Yes, exactly.

[Coda]

Chapter 2
Shamanism and Processwork

In this chapter, Mindell explores two key concepts – first attention and second attention. These are concepts of seeing or perhaps even, seeking.

In “first attention”, there is what we need to do in the day-to-day goals, the ordinary and every day shopping lists of life.

In “second attention”, we travel in altered states and other like experiences. Mindell writes:

“In special states of consciousness–while dreaming, in a coma, in creative dance, in ecstasy, during sports or loving–you slip into the second attention, however, and begin to live the dreamingbody. During psychotic-like episodes–that is, in extreme states of consciousness, such as hallucinations or multiple personalities–the dreaming process may overwhelm you . . . the dreamingbody makes you feel whole and creative.” (25)

I’ve been in such states and it is incredible. Careful, though, society and doctors may see this differently. Just don’t get caught doing this in places that aren’t safe to do so.

Mindell has a background in working with the terminally ill and he has learned many things from his experiences. He writes, “My experiences with near-death situations show me that most people drop their first attention, fall into the second one, and enter the dreamingbody near the end of life.”

This makes sense, as the first-attention activities pertain to the day-to-day things we need to do in life. We shed these responsibilities as we near death’s door. So all of the energy and focus from the first attention would naturally be there for the second attention.

Also, as near-death approaches, we are more prone to altered states of consciousness.

Mindell gives a case study in this chapter that is really fascinating, so I’ll write it out word for word, as he is describing the different types of concepts for dealing with people in altered states.

I remember, for example, a student who got stuck on a drug experience years ago in Switzerland and was brought to me in the midst of a frightening delirium. He stumbled around my room, screaming that the walls of my office were moving. When he touched them, he said, they bent. He cried because he had hurt them by touching them so roughly. The longer this went on, the more terrified he became.

This experience would have been sufficiently meaningful left to itself. But he wanted me to help him because of the terror he experienced. He was on the verge of having a ‘bad trip.’ For me to work with him in such a state, the concepts of ego, conscious, and unconscious were not useful. Instead, I thought of the wall as a secondary process with which he did not identify and asked him to believe in the wall, to feel and look at it.

“Focus your attention upon it!” I yelled. “Look at it!” I had no idea what would happen when he used his second attention. immediately, the moving wall turned into a wave on which he saw himself riding. I encouraged him to show me the wave in movement, to move as he saw the wave moving. He stood and made magnificent wavelike dance movements, surfing his visionary ocean as the waves crashed onto the each.

Suddenly he stopped, looked at me soberly, and said, “Arny, I am just too rigid in my studies!’ His delirium abated as he became excited about new directions in his studies. He needed more flexibility in his life. In this experience, the student had identified himself to begin with as a sensitive person in touch with the pain of matter.(26 – 27)

This reminds me of the saying that sometimes, it takes a breakdown to have a breakthrough.

This student was very lucky to have a shaman nearby, as Western medicine would have likely ended in a much different – and much darker – path.

At the beginning of this chapter, Mindell writes about “dream and body snapshots”. I’m going to go back to this section to piece together what happened with this student.

In exploring the dream, Mindell writes, “Out of context, dreams are fragmented stories, pictures that you can no longer quite remember from ongoing experiences. They are like momentary and incomplete snapshots of a river, so to speak. Shamanic experiences, however, come mainly from the streaming river itself.” (20)

I’m not sure I have this completely right, but I think he’s saying that we are given the pieces of the stories in our dreams, but we need the narrative of the shamanic experience in order to convey a solid story. The shamanic river is that narrative that we can use as a framework to piece our fragments together.

I think that’s what happened in the story of the student.

Again in this chapter as in the earlier one, Mindell comes back to our responsibility to our environment, bringing in a social justice theme. He writes, “Not only are we in danger of losing our rainforests and ruining our natural environment, we have forgotten our second attention, which senses the magic of the world around us.” (29)

As with the student realizing the importance of tuning into his own true sensitive nature by feeling the pain of the walls, we need to tune into our environment and realize the pain we are creating to Mother Earth. This second attention is vital to our very survival.

In the end of the chapter, Mindell gives some exercises to help the reader understand their own dreams. Remember a dream, note the memorable parts of the dream, use your second attention to focus on the lessor known body experiences. Feel. Move your hand. Move your body. Connect to your dream. He ends with, “Swing back and forth between paying attention to your normal body experience and your normal identity and paying attention to this new experience found in your dreamingbody. Practice going in and out of your dreamingbody.”

[Coda]

Part I
Developing a Double

Chapter 1
The Shaman’s Body

While reading this chapter, I realized that the reason the key concepts in Shamanism are found in so many cultures is because these concepts come not from experiences defined by culture, but the experiences that are universal to ALL cultures and to ALL humans. As Mindell writes, “Elements of peak and shamanic experiences, such as prolonged trance states, spiritual awakenings, sudden healings, meetings with ghosts, and other paranormal events, are often foreshadowed by various types of inner experiences, or “callings,” such as serious illness, near-death experiences, periods of near insanity, or “big” dreams of wise spirit figures.” (5)

And sometimes people in Western cultures use these experiences to find their way to Shamanism, especially when faced with severe illnesses that go beyond what Western medicine can cure or treat.

I found it interesting that some people don’t become Shamans until they have reached a certain age. Mindell writes about the daughter of his Australian aboriginal healer. Mindell writes, “. . . she mentioned that her father was seventy-eight. He told me that he, too, had not sought to become a healer, but had waited until his parents taught him in their advanced old age, just before death.” (5)

In the Western culture, there is a pro-youth culture that discounts the wisdom of elders. This is unfortunate, shameful, and very destructive to the younger cultures who miss out on the inheritance of wisdom.

Our awareness is further limited in the Western cultures due to tight schedules, living in loud and angry cities surrounded by the destruction of our natural environment. Our inner lives are drowned out, so we have less access to the wisdom found in our own minds, hearts, and souls.

What is so special and important about Mindell’s book is his ability to connect the Western sciences and arts with the Shamanic, as he describes “. . . living on the border between theoretical physics, shamanism, and psychology.” (14)

In studying Shamanism in African, Mindell discovers another connection – that of Shaman to community, especially to the children – “. . . African shaman healers not only worshiped the bush around them, but gave every child who crossed their path a penny, because, they explained, the children were the origins of their shamanic abilities. They said that when the children were happiest, shamanic medicine was most powerful.” (6)

A bit off topic, but I came across an article recently and the pictures in this piece really speak to what is being discussed.

Nothing says love like a tiny child with a big dog

According to Mindell, “Everything you do that is fun is baed on shamanism. Dancing at discos until you go into a trance, screaming yourself into a frenzy at a ball game or music festival, running until you are in an altered state of consciousness: All are shamanic.” (13)

But we also create our own Dark Ages here in Western culture: “Don’t forget that the oldest churches in modern Europe were built upon ancient power sites. We tend not only to build over our past and injure native people, but also to deny our own magic and belief in the unknown and to act like rationalists, as if we had created the world.” (13)

We do tend to get in our own ways in our Western culture of arrogance. Mindell is very critical of Western psychotherapy, as he states it comes “without reference to ancient world history, tends to be mostly white, middle-class dreams with as much air as earth. It is a useful dream, but it misses the eccentric nature of the shaman, love for community, and a culture in which self-knowledge is based on powerful altered states of consciousness.” (13-14)

I am not a fan of Western psychology, as most of it focuses on the individual self, not on the collective, and breeds isolationist theories that enable our industrialized, capitalistic system of oppression. You are taught that if you don’t think positive thoughts – no matter what you are faced with due to income inequality, high unemployment, lack of affordable housing, etc – that you cannot pull yourself up. It’s a lonely form of brain washing that rarely makes people feel good, especially in the long term. There’s definitely a disconnect.

Mindell mentions in several places in this chapter that there is a disconnect from Western psychology and many social justice issues. “After having observed how colonial Western politics have literally decimated millions of aboriginal people in Africa, Australia, North America, and India, and after having realized how the native peoples of Japan, China, Hawaii, and Alaska have been oppressed and murdered, silence is no longer an option for me. The political reality of aboriginal peoples today amounts to lack of civil rights. These peoples are not allowed their religious beliefs.” (14)

Truth to power on that, Mindell. Truth to power.

I’m going to add something that Mindell hasn’t connected (perhaps he will later in the book?). Another social justice issue I see is the lack of space for the reality and purpose of altered states within Western psychology and psychiatry and the link to the War on Drugs, especially in the United States. Western “medicine” has labeled altered states an illness (such as schizophrenia or manic-depression / bipolar) and locked people up and forced them on dangerous pharmaceuticals. And for people seeking altered states through drugs, they find themselves in prison. This is especially true for People of Color. So Western psychology and psychiatry have had a major hand in creating policies that play into the cruel neo-liberal agenda of mass incarceration and the mass pharmaceutical drugging of people from either of these types of experiences in altered spaces.

There are so many reasons to look to Shamanic ideals. The focus of transformation is on the inner life as it relates to aspects of altered states – “I have seen in my practice how many shamanic abilities appear when you stop doubting the reality of the spirit. In this moment, something in you transforms, and you develop a deep attention, a steady focus on irrational events. This basic shamanic tool is attention to the dreaming process. When your inner life calls and you stop doubting, a personal transformation begins.” (5)

However, Mindell is clear that Shamanic cultures also have struggles and are far from perfect – “. . . the rigid roles in which everyone is placed. Men could do this, women had to do that, and only people from certain families could be shamans.” (13)

Far from perfect, but still, with many lessons to teach us, as in the Western world, “[O]ur modern techniques often lack a sense of magic and do not address global issues such as racism, homophobia, women’s rights, and poverty.” (11)

At the end of each chapter, Mindell lists exercises that the reader may do to expand awareness on what has just been discussed. The exercises involve thinking back to when you found yourself having a good “trip” during an altered state. This could be during a spiritual ritual or while doing some process-based innerwork.

He also encourages the reader to think back on prior illnesses, feelings of going insane, the appearance of wise dream teachers, etc.

My favorite exercise is the third one – “Experiment with “assembling,” that is, identifying yourself in different ways. For a moment, see yourself as a person who always follows the dreaming process. Don’t worry about how to define this process; simply let your imagination lead you here. Follow these earlier ‘callings’ in your imagination as if they were a process trying to dream you into a certain state and not simply a symptom of your being troubled. What state have these early ‘dreamings’ been aiming at?” (17)

In the end, if you can, take those experiences of a “good trip” and look for teachings of lessons or a message. And then, “imagine living this message in your life.” (17)

[Coda]

Wow! I look forward to this! This looks really deep and – real!

It is! I have the next chapter ready to post.

Here is a bit about the key ideas of the author:

American author, therapist and teacher in the fields of transpersonal psychology, body psychotherapy, social change and spirituality. He is known for extending Jungian dream analysis to body symptoms,promoting ideas of ‘deep democracy, and interpreting concepts from physics and mathematics in psychological terms.Mindell is the founder of process oriented psychology, also called Process Work, a development of Jungian psychology influenced by Taoism, shamanism and physics. (Source: Wikipedia – Arnold Mindell)

This is a good video interview with Dr. Mindell and his wife Amy Mindell:

Amy + Arny Mindell: A Process Work Interview for Russian TV in 2013

[Coda]

Thanks for the Dan Millman talk! I look forward to listening to it. I really enjoyed his book.

We live in our heads so much, to the detriment of our hearts. I’m trying to get mine going, and in the process am asking hard questions like: What is love? How do I love? Who do I love? How can I love better? Have I ever loved?

Then, there is a complete dropping away: What am ‘I’?” Yep. Existential is a great word for it.

Thanks for explaining this and your thought process behind it and for it.

I hope your heart finds healing soon. I wish I had some sage advise, but it sounds like you are making progress on your “process work” and I hope it helps you to write about it because it sure helps others.

Thanks so much for posting these. I really appreciate that you brought the idea of book reviews here – so that people can “preview” a book before reading it themselves – or – get the “Cliff’s Notes,” er, “Coda’s Notes” version if they don’t have time to read it.

No, thank YOU for letting me writing here. I enjoyed exploring this on your site and becoming more familiar with all that you have to offer us here.

It’s truly a beautiful cyber resource, very serene and calming in the midst of a very chaotic “real” life. It’s very good to have places like this to read and refresh.

[Coda]

Epilogue
Laughter in the Wind

This is the final chapter of the book and the time and place where Dan turns from “student” to his role as “teacher”.

Ironically, though, he leaves the university and moves to San Francisco to become a house painter.

In another turn of events, he calls Joyce and invites her to come live with him in California.

And with Joyce by his side, he quit his painting job and returned to teaching only this time, not in a university, but in a small gymnastics studio.

You know, it strikes me that this is someone who really has learned about wanting and needing less, about humility, simplicity, about being happy for the sake of it without any cause or material gain.

And Joyce tells him a story – about leaving home prior to high school and not having any memory of several years. About dreams – about Dan and about “a white-haired man”.

And her nickname – Joy!

Wow, didn’t expect that.

The lack of any historical reference for Joy renders her a kind of mythic presence.

I’m quoting that from what I wrote from my entry on Chapter 2.

Full circle and all.

And Socrates? Well, he did leave a message for Dan by changing his business card (remember the business card?) from: Emergencies Only! to “Happiness”.

I really liked this part:

“Then I felt the truth of it. Socrates hadn’t come, because he had never left. He was only changed. He was the elm above my head; he was the clouds and the bird and the wind. They would always be my teachers, my friends.”

Beautiful, beautiful story.

[Coda]

Chapter 8
The Gate Opens

This chapter continues right where the last chapter left off – with Dan hiking deep into the mountains, continuing his search and he is happy, as he thinks, “For the first time in years, it seemed, I was content.”

He hikes, eats edible roots and berries, and meditates.

And then – suddenly – out of the woods – out of nowhere really – out walks Socrates!

And the contentment he felt seems to fade away. He confesses to Socrates, “I have nothing to bring you, Socrates. I’m still lost – no closer to the gate than I was when we first met. I’ve failed you, and life has failed me; life has broken my heart.”

And Socrates says something so unexpected – “Yes! Your heart has been broken, Dan – broken open to reveal the gate, shining within. It’s the only place you haven’t looked. Open your eyes, buffoon – you’ve almost arrived!”

After a day of swimming and hiking, Dan tells Socrates what has happened over the past few years. And when he asks Soc where he goes from here, Soc says, “Why cares? . . . A fool is ‘happy’ when his cravings are satisfied. A warrior is happy without reason. That’s what makes happiness the ultimate discipline – above all else I ahve taught you. Happiness is not just something you feel – it is who you are.”

He goes onto say, “This is the final task I will ever give you, and it goes on forever. Act happy, be happy, without a reason in the world. Then you can love, and do what you will.”

Okay, here’s where it gets weird for me (and I don’t remember this part being in the movie version) – Socrates tells Dan about Plato’s Allegory of the Cave. Here’s a short video clip about it for those who may not have heard of it:

Plato’s Allegory of the Cave – Alex Gendler

The reason this affected me so much is I came across this a few months ago in another venue and it’s the “connecting points” that seem very surreal. So it’s like my own journey is being connected when these various threads have these kinds of connecting points, one part of my life (my outer life) is now connected to my Urban Shaman studies (my inner life).

And Plato’s Allegory of the Cave is one of those connecting points. I’ve been awakening from so many illusions over the past few years and seeing threads of connections emerge is really cool.

Socrates and Dan sit around a campfire at night in a cave (very fitting!) and Soc says, “All the peoples of the world, Dan, are trapped within the Cave of their own minds. Only those few warriors who see the light, who cut free, surrendering everything, can laugh into eternity. And so will you, my friend.”

Suddenly, Dan is grabbed by something or someone pulling him deeper into the cave.

He hears Socrates say, “This is your final journey.”

Falling, damaged and broken, Dan lands in a meadow. Time is altered and passes faster and Dan has the feeling of being dead, as if his flesh decomposing.

He had become “part of the carrier birds that had feasted on my flesh, part of the insects and rodents, and part of their predators in a great cycle of life and earth. I became their ancestors, until ultimately they, too, were returned to the earth.”

He continues: “The Dan Millman who had lived long ago was gone forever, a flashing moment in time – but I remained unchanged through all the ages. I was no Myself, the Consciousness that observed all, was all. All my separate parts would continue forever; forever changing, forever new.”

He comes back to himself, lying in the cave. Fear was gone. He had survived his own death because, as Millman writes, “Because I knew.”

He and Soc dance around the cave in joy at Dan’s awakening. As Millman writes, “I didn’t speak much, but I laughed often, because every time I looked around – at the earth, the sky, the sun, the trees, the lakes, the streams – I realized that it was all Me – that no separation existed at all.”

As Millman describes this: “There was no way to describe the impact of this knowledge. I was simply awake.”

Yes! I know I’ve posted this before, but it’s so good and so relates to this that I must post it again:

How Do You Define Yourself? – Alan Watts

I really, really like this line describing Dan’s experience:

“I had lost my mind and fallen into my heart.”

And thus, the gate has opened. But it is a “gateless gate” because the gate itself is an illusion. There are no barriers.

Socrates warns Dan that he will lose the experience of his recent vision, but Dan is not afraid of this.

And they part ways, and Dan goes back to his teaching job at the university and Soc disappears into the mountains.

Dan realizes something really incredible: “I closed my eyes to meditate, but realized that I was always meditating now, with my eyes wide open.”

Dan and Soc meet up later at the gas station. And here, at this place where it all started, Soc hands Dan his journal, his life story. Soc has come to the end of his journey with Dan. His work his done.

Soc gives him some words of advice: “You will write and you will teach. You will live an ordinary life, learning how to remain ordinary in a troubled world to which, in a sense, you no longer belong. Remain ordinary, and you can be useful to others.”

I really like the sense of humility here, especially after such a powerful experience such as exploring the finality of the life/death experience. It tempers the feeling of power of immortality and fearlessness. The contrast is what makes this so grand.

Soc walks into the bathroom . . . and disappears . . . .

In a way, this is another reminder of humility. What a place to make a grand exit!

Dan leaves the gas station to return to his job and his life, full of love and compassion for his teacher, his mentor, his friend.

Next up is the Epilogue. For next week. . . .

[Coda]

The exercise of exploring emotions like an infant is an excellent practice. Accept, let go. Accept – FEEL – Let go.

However for someone with a history of trauma there may be some intermediate steps. For example, practised lying down is too vulnerable, too like the child who was traumatised. For these people, practise should be at least sitting, if not standing, to emphasise the adult power with strong emotions. It is more difficult to feel while sitting and standing, but the emotions are less likely to be overpowering. For someone with no trauma, practising this exercise lying down – or in a foetal position, would bring the emotions up more strongly.

Thanks for mentioning (cautioning) this. This is very true. It reminds me of the specific poses on trauma-sensitive yoga that can open up too much, too soon, too vulnerable.

I’m having an ego-shedding experience right now. It’s scary! When I look at – everything – I wonder about Love and connection and the importance of things, and I can feel myself shifting and actually disappearing into a sort of nothingness.

Sounds very existential. Is this related to your recent fast?

Great book, eh?

Awesome book! Thanks for recommending it.

I just read this Christmas Story – how Dickens predated Freud in his wisdom of healing from trauma via dreams. You might say that A Christmas Carol is an ultimate shamanic healing – the healing occurs in dreaming, in deep access to the Inner State, and the man is transformed.

Great article off the MiA site.

I never thought of that story as “shamanic”, so I may have to give it a re-read in that context.

Thanks for the feedback!

[Coda]

Chapter 7
The Final Search

In this chapter, Dan and Soc go on a midnight run up the mountains. Previously, as Dan was recovering, this was a very difficult run, but he’s made significant progress and he runs effortlessly now.

But Socrates isn’t so fortunate. After Dan sprints ahead and waits, he realizes something is wrong and goes back to find his friend. Socrates is lying face down on the ground without a pulse.

Dan offers him CPR and revives him! There’s energy running through his body and he offers his own life up in exchange for his friend’s.

The next day, Dan visits Soc in the hospital and Soc explains this “lesson” as he calls it. “No matter how strong we appear, each of us has a hidden weakness that may be our ultimate undoing. House Rules: For every strength there is a weakness – and for every weakness, a strength. Even as a child, my weakness has always been my heart. And you, my young friend, have another kind of ‘heart trouble.'”

Dan doesn’t understand so Soc continues. “You haven’t yet opened your heart fully, to life, to each moment. The peacful warrior’s way is not about invulnerability, but aboslute vulnerability – to the world, to life, and to the Presence you felt. All along I’ve shown you by example that a warrior’s life is not about imagined perfection or victory; it is about love. Love is the warrior’s sword; wherever it cuts, it gives life, not death.”

What Soc demonstrated by going on a run when he knew it could kill him was to teach what he had experienced. As Soc says, “I am a warrior, so my way is action. I am a teacher, so I teach by example.”

Soc tells Dan that Dan is also headed in the direction to be a teacher. I know I’m learning a lot just from reading this novel!

And then Soc sends Dan away – for 9 or 10 years! He knows that Dan is still searching, still seeking. Soc says, “A warrior is not something you become, Dan. It is something you either are, in this moment, or something you are not. The Way itself creates the warrior. And now forget me. Go, and come back radiant.”

Dan moves back to LA, his hometown. And he calls Linda and when she arrives in LA, proposes to her. They get married in a private ceremony at the courthouse.

It’s sad, though, because Dan says, “Why did I feel as if I had lost something, as if I had forgotten something important? The feeling was never to leave me.”

It’s the permanence of this sadness that’s so disquieting, especially after all he’d been through.

They settle into married life. Linda is a part-time bank teller and Dan sells life insurance.

Soon, all of Dan’s training and discipline begins to leave . . .

After finding out Linda is pregnant, they move to northern California for new work and to be near Linda’s parents.

And Dan finds a job as a coach at Stanford, fulfilling Soc’s prophecy that he would become a teacher.

But still, Dan’s feeling of loss continues. His memories of Socrates and all of their experiences together were fading. And it took its toll on their marriage.

Their marriage struggles after several years and one child is born. Dan works as a coach, sits with a Zen group, and studies aikido in the evenings. He is very much in search mode.

He takes a position in Ohio on the faculty at Oberlin College, but still, it’s not enough. He continues his search. His work at Oberlin gives him opportunities to travel around the world – Hawaii, Japan, Hong Kong, India.

And he had many experiences, but sill, there is that feeling of loss.

He and Linda are definitely on separate paths, but stay together for a long time and try. But after 6 years or so, their marriage comes to an end.

Dan moves to Palo Alto and lives a solitary life, seeking solace in what he had trained in earlier with Soc, going deeper and deeper into his mind, as he says, “like a sword.”

He then goes to seek answers in the Sierra Nevada, to get lost in the mountains.

• This reply was modified 7 years ago by Coda.

[Coda]

Chapter 4
The Sword Is Sharpened

In this chapter, Dan is tested in ways he never imagined.

He buys a Triumph motorcycle, the same kind that Steve McQueen rode in The Great Escape movie Dan watched back earlier in the novel. But this isn’t the movies. And Dan doesn’t arrive safely – he’s involved in a very serious accident that shatters his leg.

The recovery for Dan is slow and painful, not only physically, but also psychologically since his doctor tells him he likely won’t be a gymnast anymore. But Dan sees things differently. He’ll just have to work harder, become stronger.

Dan’s a fighter. He slowly recovers his health, using meditation and his ability to singularly focus. What was the conversation we were having in the previous posts on “flow”? Yep, like that.

Dan fights on, moving to crutches, and then to a cane.

But while he’s still recovering from his accident, he comes down with a bad case of mononucleosis. Soc sends him to a hospital to see a regular doctor, but then he visits Dan with a very bizarre mix of herbs and a urine elixir to aid in the healing process.

Amazing what we will swallow when we’re sick! But the next day, Dan is feeling like a new man.

There’s an interesting exercise that Dan and Soc discuss – exploring emotions the way infants do – excepting emotions completely and then letting them go . . . .

A new character is introduced in this chapter – Joseph, who spent a number of years as Socrates cook and personal attendant. But now he has his own cafe and he specializes in uncooked natural foods.

And then Soc sets Dan off on a fast – from food and from sex. But this doesn’t last and Dan ends up hooking up with his nurse from when he was in the hospital. He breaks his fast and makes love to Valerie and Soc bans him from the gas station for a month.

Yep, warriors aren’t perfect.

But Dan has a way of bouncing back and he embraces the natural food diet, learning self control, and finds himself healing more and more.

He goes to visit Joseph, only Joseph’s cafe has burned down. In a lesson on not getting attached, Joseph mourns the loss very briefly and then simply let’s it go . . . .

But more tragedy comes, as Joseph passes away from leukemia. In the hardest lesson to learn, Socrates states that death is a transformation, nothing to be feared.

In many ways, I find this comforting.

In the last scene in this chapter, Dan has another vision where he must slay a giant with a sword. And he’s successful!

But looking deeper, there’s a metaphor here. As Dan says, “Soc, I’ve been battling illusions my whole life, preoccupied with every petty personal problem. I’ve dedicated my life to self-improvement without grasping the one problem that sent me seeking in the first place. While trying to make everything in the world work out for me, I kept getting sucked back into my own mind, always preoccupied with me, me, me. That giant was me- the ego, the little self- who I’ve always believed myself to be. And I cut through it!”

Dan transforms himself a LOT during this one chapter.

[Coda]

Did we lose Chapter 4? Where Dan has his accident?

Uh oh! I know I posted it, but maybe forgot to press the “Submit” button?

I’ll add it before going onto Chapter 6. Sorry about that!

Again, this is why I say so much that Art is Truth.

Yes! I love that Chris Hedges video clip. Awesome stuff.

And what about literature to combat propaganda?

Is Literature ‘the Most Important Weapon of Propaganda’?

This is why I like active meditations. Tai Chi, for me, there comes a flow when the breath and the body are one, and the gentleness of it, lacks striving. Unfortunately, it only comes with mastery – so – as I get older and creakier and more forgetful, it is harder to surrender to that mastery.

Brilliant! I hadn’t thought of the “flow” of Tai Chi, but that makes sense.

I’d like to study this at some point. I tried earlier, but never stayed with it. But I don’t think I truly understood it’s importance and without that narrative, there was no connection.

Thanks for your thoughts. 🙂

[Coda]

Chapter 5
The Mountain Path

In this chapter, Dan’s training is moving to the next level because he survived the duel in the previous chapter. As Socrates tells him, “For one thing, you’re going to have to find the answers from within.”

And then he sends Dan to the back of the gas station to sit and meditate and find his own answers – and not to come back until he has something “of value” to tell Soc.

The first piece of wisdom that Dan gets during this meditation session is something he got from a psychology lecture:

“Beneath all our apparent differences we share the same human needs and fears; we’re all on the same path together, guiding one another. And this understanding brings compassion.”

Nice, but not good enough – Socrates sends him back to do more meditating.

The next revelation he reveals to Socrates is, “So far I’ve seen beneath people’s social masks to their common fears and trouble minds, but that has only made me cynical, because I haven’t yet looked still deeper to find the light within them.”

Again, nice, but back he goes to his philosopher’s stone behind the gas station for more meditating. At this point, Dan has been up all night and skipped his classes during the day. It’s night again.

Still in recovery from his injuries, Dan does a Tai Chi routine in order to help his stiffening muscles from this lengthy meditation session. And this channels his mind more clearly.

And eureka! He flashes back to a recent memory where he was doing Tai Chi in a public park and had fallen, embarrassing himself in front of a bunch of teenagers who laughed at him. He exclaims: “There are no ordinary moments!”

And with that wisdom, Socrates is finally pleased.

And this lesson follows him into the gym where he is diligently building himself back up after his accident. There are no ordinary moments he thinks as he goes through his gymnastic routine, very mindful of his injured leg.

In this chapter, Dan tests himself, going for a very long run with Joy and testing himself even farther with gymnastics on the trampoline, making his teammates worried that he’d re-injure himself.

In this more advanced training, Socrates brings in an important concept that really ties into trauma therapy: Working to release tension in the muscles in order to release the past.

That made me think of this brilliant Jon Kabbat-Zinn guided meditation:

Jon Kabat Zinn Body Scan Meditation GUIDED MEDITATION

It struck me how much this chapter was about “the body”, whereas the previous chapters were more about “the mind”. But since the two are connected (although you wouldn’t know that from western medicine), this does make sense.

But wait, in the midst of a grueling run, Joy explains to Dan, “This wasn’t a test of your body; it was a test of your spirit – a test to see if you could push on- not just with the hill, but with our training. If you had stopped, it would have been the end. But you passed, Danny, you passed with flying colors.”

The next lesson involves satori. Soc explains, “Now let me tell you about satori, a Zen concept. Satori occurs when attention rests in the present moment, when the body is alert, sensitive, relaxed, and the emotions are open and free. Satori is what you experienced when the knife was flying toward you. Satoris is the warrior’s state of being.”

Dan says he can relate that to his gymnastic competition experiences. But Soc says it’s more universal – “Sports, dance, or music, and any other challenging activity can serve as a gateway to satori. You imagine that you love gymnastics, but it’s merely the wrapping for the gift of satori.”

I’ve experienced this myself while playing keyboard and guitar! I never thought of it as unwrapping something much bigger – it’s the gift of that intense, present moment awareness.

To better understand the process, Soc reminds Dan of how he was able to keep going in his runs with Joy – “When you ran up the hill after Joy, you didn’t just gaze wistfully at the top of the mountain, you looked directly in front of you and took one step at a time. That’s how it works.”

I like the way he breaks it down into manageable steps.

Toward the end of this chapter, Dona and Socrates were meeting in the mornings, not at night, in order to go running, although he ended up running with Joy until Soc returned from what he explained was probably the flu. But it still left unanswered questions, as always.

Socrates is one mysterious dude.

Dan has been working extra hard and wants to prove to his Coach that he’s ready to compete again. But his coach is a hard sell.

First, Dan impresses everyone with his floor exercises, next the rings.

And he did it not only to impress his coach and teammates, but also Socrates, who was visiting the gym. In a bit of comic relief, Dan had already told his teammates to call Socrates “Marilyn”. Socrates plays along, pretending to be Dan’s eccentric grandfather, Marilyn.

The concept of “meditating your action” comes up. This is different than simply “doing” something. Soc explains:

“Meditating an actin is different from doing it. To do, there is a doer, a self-conscious ‘someone’ performing. But when you meditate an action, you’ve already released attachment to outcomes. There’s no ‘you’ left to do it. In forgetting yourself, you become what you do, so your action is free, spontaneous, without ambition, inhibition, or fear.”

I think one of the key statements in this chapter is something that Millman places in there calmly, kind of like an afterthought – “Though gymnastics was no longer the center of my life, it was still an important part, so I did my very best.”

Dan’s life seems so much richer now. He’s dating again (a college girlfriend named Linda), training, easily getting through his studies, and has this very powerful meditation practice.

The chapter ends with the three-day competition against Southern Illinois University. Dan competes on the high bar and makes a 9.8, wining the competition for his team.

But it comes with the solemn realization that comes to those who get a hard won victory and then it’s all over. His college career is coming to a close and he’ll face the real world soon. On the plane on the way home from the competition, he thinks, “All these years I had been sustained by an illusion – happiness through victory and now that illusion was burned to ashes. I was no happier, no more fulfilled, for all of my achievements.”

Okay, a bit of a downer to leave on, but I’m sure there will be more adventures and more insight in the next chapter. Happiness, from what little I know, is an illusion, so finding it may not be in Dan’s best interest, as it could be a distraction from something even better.

[Author]

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